Sometime this year I was really challenged spiritually. Not by anyone but by life in general. Let me tell you things got very difficult. I was at an all time spiritual low. I almost gave up, or was it give in. The other day I watched a Joyce Meyer sermon and she preached about “if you have asked God for big things then get ready for him to do some big changes in your life.” Some of these changes are never comfortable. So yes I was at a bad place spiritually. Mainly because being a Christian I expected God to always cushion me from life, but what happens when he lest things happen to me or you? So I kicked and I fought, struggled so that I could get out of the situations that I was in. But you know I was not supposed to get out, not at all I was to stay in. Also why was I kicking and pushing. Remember I believe and really on God I should have leaned in. So after I run out of energy from all the kicking I gave in and I spoke to God. The challenges did not disappear but I went through them and at the end of each challenge God made a way not my way but his way. The challenges are still with me every single day, but God too is with me every single day. So here I am with no scars or bruises and I have stopped kicking because I realized that through all this I was praying but I was too impatient and too whiling to do it my way that I was not waiting on God to come through. Now I am sleeping more, I am more relaxed and I am waiting and trusting God even more, it may not go my way but I am sure God’s way is 10 times better.
What normally starts out as a way of getting from one point to another exposes me to a cap that needs deep hit. I mean why else would it stay looking like that. Even more if its swollen it might have been clobbered by someone and it needs some attention, and since the start of time deep heat has always been the answer.
He does not seem to notice that his cap needs deep heat but I do. Since we are in slow moving traffic I get to have an unit-erupted look at his cap. His head is pocking outside is slide to open window because for some reason having it in the vehicle would be unacceptable.
Before I get carried away lets get back to his cap. It’s yellow in color and at the top it recedes backwards. From his face I can tell he really feels as cool as his fellow peers one whom happens to be riding in the Ma3 I am in. But his cap needs Deep Heat.
So by now the traffic is easing up and the Ma3 is now moving much faster. The cool breeze has now turned into a cold fast moving wind that lands on is face but that does make him pull his head in for shelter. I am talking about the Ma3 conductor and the caps on their head.
I know you have seen those caps. The front top part appears to be swollen while the rest of the cap appears to be in normal shape. That cap needs deep heat. A few sprays would definitely bring the swelling down. And if he sleeps on it the swelling will all be gone by morning.
Every time I see one of this caps its as though I am seeing it for the first time. The same thoughts always go through my mind. Who manufactures this things and were do you buy one? I now switch my focus to the conductor in my Ma3
At some point he pulls his head in to collect the money that you owe him. Once he is inside he will be met by the latest in Ma3 sound system. That is the part I am comfortable with but wait. Did the rapper on that song just say F**k, and rhymed it with B***h. It takes skills to make those two words rhyme.
I now turn to my conductor whose cap also needs deep heat. Hoping that he has noticed the music that his driver is playing. But he is unmoved and is not going to say anything about it. I am doomed and I have to wait until I tweet it on @MasRoute and @CondaNaDere.
I normally take time to look in amazement at the conduct and often interesting behavior of the Nairobi Ma3 conductor. Not the wangora conductor but the nganya conductor. Have you ever noticed how this guy quickly gets thrown of his work schedule when he notices a hot mama?
I am normally seated at the seat opposite the conductors door. For this to happen as I am about to describe it, it has be a 33 seater Ma3 that feels like your inside the Ken wood factory an their testing all their latest sub woofers at the same time.
So this particular conductor who has worn the latest in jeans fashion an a white vest is hanging at the door. Then as the Ma3 slows to go over a bump and into a stage, this girl catches his eye. Without a second thought he decides to get of this moving Ma3 and try his lack with her. But why would he wait for the ma3 to stop after all he will just run after the mat and get back on board.
The conversation has to be quick because after all “kuna ithaa” (loosely translated to he has money to make). After what appears to be mixed conversation between you are very pretty and would you like to go with me in my Ma3 the baddest of all Eastlands Ma3s. The conductor notices that this conversation is not going to get him the girl. Since he is a man of many ideas he decides he might as well get her money, and without a moment to waste he starts asking the girl to board his Ma3 at a subsidized fee of 30 bob.
He is now running, chasing after his Ma3 that is now leaving the stage. He catches up with it an boards it with the at most style and flair. One leg is inside the Ma3 and the other is peddling on the tarmac. He is now in and as usual this Ma3 has more that one conductor. I can tell that conductor number two is not very happy with what Tosh the conductor was up to. After all this is a work hour and no distractions are allowed. Or is he “catching feelings” because the chick was hot and he wishes he would gone after her.
He still has some words for Tosh about his conduct and all I can hear are words like, “uko down, za ovyo, ufala” followed by the occasional click. All this time Tosh does not seem to be listening to what his coworker is saying. Instead he is moving his head to the beat and singing along to the song. And he sings…. Dear Keisha, How Are U Doing? I Have To Write This Letter Cause My Phone Is Ruined……. Pass A Pen And Give Me Some Paper.
With his write hand holding on for support and his left hand outside the Ma3, he gestures to the driver through the side mirrors and shouts “Gari e-Imba e-imbe” then he lets out a screem that goes against his demeanor.
Now we are driving by Buru Buru at about 80kph but it feels like 120 kph. The occasional pararira and zzzzzzzschik zzzzschik chu chu chu chu can be heard coming from this Ma3. We drive by a primary school and I am sure they can hear everything I am hearing. I imagine a literature class is going on but all they can hear is next song on the playlist, “kude kude”. If I could see inside the class I would probably see five guys seated at the back of the class not attentive but each sketching on a piece of paper. And if I could see that piece of paper I bet it would be an Umoina Ma3, with passenger almost falling out because “iko excess”. And they would have g clefs drawn coming out of the Ma3 with the lyrics Kude Kude, and the driver would have his Surba for the day. #HahahaVsLol
Visit the post for more.